With great respect, with love even, I welcome you to my blog which tells the story of a 58 year old man who is revitalizing his life by realizing a childhood ambition to be a successful author. Those of you who have read previous entries will be aware that John Heston, the writer both of this blog and the incipient novel entitled ‘I’S NOVEL ABOUT HOW THE WORLD’S YOUNGEST BEST-SELLING AUTHOR (FAILED) ACHIEVED REDEMPTION AND MODERATE SUCCESS AT THE AGE OF 60 - HE BLOODY HOPES’, is a man divided in himself.
In part he has an eye on eternity. From this perspective the fiddliness of life makes him ache for the Elysian fields and his attitude to the happenstances of life is based on his guru’s description of existence as ‘a story told by a grandmother’ or, more poetically, ‘a play of sun and shadows’. In another part, however, he knows he has a power to create and while acknowledging that the shadows exist, he wants to make the most of the sunshine and have a good life.
I’m that part and I’m called Jack. I’ve been promised free range to express myself today so I intend to be as positive as I can for I never know when John’s going to come back and reimprison me in his Vedantic straightjacket. Ultimately, of course, I’d like to strike out entirely on my own, become individuated in my own right, because I don’t accept that I’m a foolish part of John. On the contrary I believe that I’m the real McCoy and he’s just the product of his upbringing.
Anyway I’ve only got a 1,000 words in which to appear before you so rather than slag off my host, I’ll get down to business.
But why does he have to call me his inner American? Wake-up, Bozo, the English can be positive too, just look at… (we might have to come back to this one).
So, tasked with turning john into a successful author, I turned to my learning tools, the techniques and technologies imparted to me during forty years of seeking for the keys of happiness. It is true, as John indicated, that, judging by results alone, little has been accomplished for all the hithering and thithering. However, I think we know whose fault this is. Now that the twin realities of having spent all his inheritance sunning himself on beaches and having to sign on for Job seekers Allowance have hit him, I can but hope, nay, insist, that I truly am allowed out of the box.
My chosen representatives of the ‘how to get your head sorted and your life together by learning how to create’ philosophies are Rebirthing, Avatar, and Robert Fritz’s stuff on Creating. Although at times I qualified to teach two of these courses, I’m not claiming that they are the best, just the ones I know.
Each in their own way addresses goals and each emphasizes the need for clarity and specificity envisioning the end result, followed by close inspection of the current situation. (NB to John: total pessimism, physical lethargy, and intellectual paralysis and are not considered helpful towards creating what’s wanted. Nor is whinging about next week’s cataract operation. It’s a minor thing, get over it. The way I see it, anyone can be miserable but being happy, for no reason, when one of your oldest friends is dying, for example, takes guts.).
So I’ve spent the last few days rereading all my old books and jotting down notes (which I wrote in such small handwriting I can’t now decipher them).
From Rebirthing I:
Selected a specific, important (to me) and challenging goal.
Asked myself on a scale of 1 to 100, how certain am I that I am willing to achieve my goal?
Made a list of everything I could think of that might help me achieve this goal.
Used the list to make a logical plan with clear steps. (Only sort of done this.)
For at least 2 minutes said to myself, Something I have to give up to follow this plan is…
Have fitted the plan and into my schedule
And begun.
From Creating I
Decided what I wanted to create (and learned I shouldn’t create to remedy something that is wrong)
Defined Current reality in relation to the end result
Identified the action steps needed to get from here to there.
From Avatar I
Have assessed the rightness of my goal
Examined my beliefs regarding my abilities to attain my objective and have attempted to remove hindering cognitions and feelings.
Paid note to the following tips:
Increase attention on the goal: Plan backwards from the goal: identify sub-goals: utilize someone else’s energy: Work day and night.
In the past I’ve attended ten day long programs practising and refining these techniques from morning to night. If John thinks I can get all this done while he drinks tea, smokes and stares out of the window ‘having profound thoughts’ he is much mistaken. Once I’ve had time to digest the fruits of my psychic gardening, I will lay out a plan for him which I shall insist that he adheres to. Progress is being made.. Two days ago I hadn’t a laptop of my own, nor a printer, nor a scanner. (This last item was a rash buy and it now appears that it can’t produce the miracle I required, i.e. being able to translate my elderly typed documents into Microsoft Word.) Nor did I know how good I would find my writing to be when I dug it out of its boxes. Why oh why was I so easily discouraged?
Now I’ve at least three techniques to deal with downheartedness caused by rejections. The only question is, will John let me use them or will he stay within his habitual limits - as so many of us are tempted to do?
My time is up. I truly hope I will meet you again. In case not, here’s a poem to remember me by. I wrote it one day when I’d escaped my shackles and teased myself into a state of ecstasy. John hates it but sometimes I just don’t care.
MAGIC
Magic in the starry sky
Magic in the birds
Magic in the trees
Magic in the seas
Magic in the rocks
Magic in the sounds
Magic in the views
Magic, power, and wonder.
Magic in the music
Magic in the rainbow
Magic on the beach
Magic in the dance
Magic in the dreams of the people here
Magic, power, and wonder.
Magic in the songs of my sons
Magic in the high-wire act of my beautiful daughter
Magic in my lover’s embrace
Magic in the moment
Magic in the breath
Magic in the love of things
Magic in the life
Magic in the silence
Magic at the end of time
Magic, power, and wonder.
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